Hello, Forty!
40 isn’t just a number — it’s a story of growth, choices, and courage. This chapter is called ‘My Turn,’ a love letter to myself, my journey, and the lessons that shaped the woman I am today.
The Chapter I’m Ready to Own
The Daughter’s Dream
In my 20s, I lived mostly for my parents’ dreams. I had always wanted to study medicine — to heal, to serve — but life steered me toward Textile Engineering, where I discovered a fascination for innovation and functionality in industrial and medical textiles. Even when opportunities arose to pursue medicine through AIIMS, the thought of leaving home felt impossible. My career path shifted again, this time into Information Technology, and pursuing a Master’s in Business Administration transformed me from a rookie trainer into a Business Analyst. Yet, through every twist and turn, curiosity, creativity, and self-expression burned quietly within me — not as a passing spark, but as a steady fire that refused to fade, reminding me there was a life I was truly meant to create..
The Partner’s Promise
At 28, I moved to the United States for my husband’s career, and my professional life came to a pause. Unsure how to spend my time, I turned back to a long-loved passion: photography. My first camera, a gift from my grandfather when I was 18, had ignited a flame that never truly faded. Years later, my husband’s gift of a professional camera felt like an invitation — permission to explore, to see the world through my own lens, and to grow in deeply meaningful ways. During this career break, CreativeLive became my classroom, where I honed my artistry and learned the foundations of building a business. And when the COVID lockdowns brought stillness to the world, they also gave me space — to focus, experiment, and nurture a craft that was slowly transforming into a calling.
Turning Point: Learning From Experience
In my mid-30s, I encountered a situation that left a lasting mark on me — one that reshaped how I approach both life and business. It was a rigid, transactional experience, a moment that could have easily shaken my confidence. Even after I had already invested and made a purchase, words were spoken through a proverb: ‘If a dog could eat what a horse eats, then every home would have a horse,’ leaving me feeling judged rather than respected.
That moment became a turning point — a clear reminder of what I would never allow to take root in myself, my business, or my brand. From that day forward, I made a promise: to build a life and a business grounded not in greed or transactional thinking, but in connection, respect, and authenticity. As the timeless wisdom of the Thirukkural reminds :
“பொருளின் பெருக்கினால் பெருக்கம் உண்டோ, அறத்தின் பெருக்கினால் பெருக்கம் உண்டோ.”
(Does true growth come from material wealth — or from the abundance of virtue?)
Photography and Creativity
Every day, I am reminded of the profound responsibility and privilege of this work. I have built my business into a brand grounded in a philosophy that honors craft, service, and integrity equally. Each session is intentional, meaningful, and deeply personal — yet above all, it reflects the respect, care, and attention I hold for everyone I encounter.
From the very first client who trusted me with rented wardrobe pieces, to those who notice and cherish the subtlest nuances in their images, to anyone who reaches out with a question or simply connects with me — every interaction matters. Every person is honored, valued, and treated with authenticity and care, regardless of whether they book, participate in a model call, or simply inquire. Their time, trust, and stories are gifts that inspire me to approach every frame, every conversation, every experience with intention, heart, and integrity.
This is the essence of my brand: a commitment to respect and honor all who cross my path, because true value isn’t conditional — it’s rooted in connection, empathy, and authenticity.
I am ready. My turn is here - Unapologetically!
Now, at 40, I finally claim my turn. This isn’t about rejecting my past, parents, or partner — I love them deeply. It’s about honoring my love for my family while embracing my passions. Self-love, to me, has always meant adapting with grace, embracing change, and focusing on growth rather than complaining or comparing.
They always say, “Empty vessels make the most noise,” and that “silence speaks louder than words.” Wise counsel, of course — and much of it holds true. Yet there are moments when silence simply won’t suffice, especially as shade is cast, stories are twisted, and false narratives are spun with surprising creativity. In those moments, the world leaves no choice but to speak for yourself, assert your worth, and claim what is rightfully yours.
I celebrate the woman I’ve become:
A cultivator of wisdom, meaningful experiences, and growth for those around me.
A woman who treasures integrity, purpose, and the principles that give life depth and meaning.
A professional who pursues excellence, intention, and ethical practice in everything I create.
A human committed to compassion, authenticity, and uplifting others through action before words.
I also take a moment to sincerely apologize to anyone I may have knowingly or unknowingly hurt along the way. Every choice, every interaction, every decision has been a lesson — and I commit to moving forward with respect, care, and integrity.
This chapter is about visibility — a space I’ve long struggled to claim. I’ve never sought attention, never shouted to be seen. I’ve always connected deeply, spoken meaningfully, but mostly in person. Now, I am learning to show up fully — to present my brand, share my work, and express my values unapologetically.
I am soft and strong, nurturing and creative, vulnerable and powerful — all at once!
🖤 The Day My Mother Stepped Into the Light 🖤
The Grace That Raised Me
A personal story that changed everything. After years of gently asking my mother to let me photograph her, she finally said yes… in the most unexpected way. This is the story of a timeless portrait, a moment of self-love, and a dream that quietly came true.
🌿 The Woman Behind Every Smile
For as long as I can remember, my mother has been the quiet architect of every joyful photograph in our family album. She is the gentle hand smoothing a rebellious pleat, the voice reminding us to stand tall, the soft laugh behind the camera coaxing genuine smiles from shy faces. She made sure everyone else felt beautiful and seen, yet she never allowed those same gifts to be turned toward herself.
Whenever I offered—“Amma, let me take a portrait of you. Just you.”—she would wave me away with a polite smile.
“Why all that fuss? I’m fine.”
Her entire photographic legacy consisted of passport photos—small, utilitarian rectangles void of artistry, captured under fluorescent lights. They served their purpose, but they were never meant to honor her spirit.
✨ The Moment That Was Meant to Be
July 5th was circled on my calendar—a maternity session I had been eagerly preparing for. But as fate would have it, that session was unexpectedly canceled. I didn’t think much of it at first; things like this happen. Soon after, the date was filled again, this time for a beauty session. I felt grateful to still be creating that day.
But then, a week before the session, I had a call from client to have it rescheduled due a medical emergency.
As I sat with my planner in one hand and my phone in the other, ready to inform my makeup artist, that the day was now open, I heard my mom’s voice behind me. Soft. Almost hesitant.
"If your shoot is canceled… will you photograph me?"
My hands went still. I turned slowly, heart pounding. I’ve asked her so many times over the years, only to be met with her gentle refusals. She’s always brushed it off, saying she didn’t need anything fancy. That she was fine with her passport photos.
But this time was different. Her tone wasn’t dismissive—it was hopeful. Almost tender.
And in that instant, I knew. This day, this moment, this opening in my schedule—it wasn’t an accident. It was a gift.
The butterflies in my stomach were undeniable. But beneath them was a quiet certainty: This was meant to be.
My heart whispered, This is your moment to give her what she’s always given you—love, attention, and the confidence to shine.
🎥 Finding Her Muse
Just one day before the photoshoot while getting dressed up for July 4 fireworks event, I asked softly, “What’s your inspiration, Amma?”
Her eyes lit up, wistful and daring all at once.
“I want it rugged,” she said, her voice steady, “but like Savithri.”
Savithri—one of Indian cinema’s legendary actresses—embodies grace threaded with quiet strength. In that instant, I pictured monochrome frames, soft grain mimicking old film stock, the dramatic play of shadow and light that once danced across Kollywood screens.
That single sentence from my mother became a doorway into her private dreamscape. She wasn’t just agreeing to a portrait; she was inviting me to see her as she saw herself—an everyday woman with an extraordinary story.
✂️ A Silent Signal of Readiness
When she flew in from India, I noticed : her perfectly shaped brows and freshly trimmed hair. My mother—a woman who rarely indulged in salons—had made an appointment before packing her suitcase. Without words, she said, I’m ready to honor myself.
But, It was only at that moment when she asked if I could photograph her, tears pricked my eyes. For the first time, I realized how long she’d been tucking her own desires behind ours. This portrait session was not vanity; it was a long-overdue act of self-love.
👗 Signature Silver Silk
My mother’s taste has always been rooted in simplicity and authenticity. Ornate zari borders and heavy embellishments were never her style. Instead, She prefer silks and cotton, in pure form. We really wanted to use a Kanchi Silk, unfortunately we dint have any closer to silver / soft white. So we arrived clutching a folded silver tussar silk saree—its surface a shimmer of moonlight, its texture whispering of hand-loomed heritage.
And yes — she found it tucked neatly in my collection. We both smiled when she pulled it out like she’d been saving it for just this moment.
She smoothed it over her lap, explaining, “This fabric speaks softly but carries strength. Like Savithri did on screen.”
That saree became our anchor. Its quiet luminosity promised to glow in black and white, turning every pleat into a brushstroke of light.
🖤 Crafting the Vision
I called in my Makeup Artist, Mayanne, who has a gift for translating emotion into makeup and hair. Together we designed a look that honored simplicity yet echoed vintage glamour—a soft swirl of hair pinned low, kohl-rimmed eyes that could hold an audience, lips left neutral to let her smile lead.
When my mother sat before the mirror, seeing the transformation take shape, I caught the reflection of her eyes brimming. She reached up, fingertips trembling at her own cheekbones, as though meeting a long-lost friend.
“Is that really me?” she whispered.
“Yes, Amma. This is who we’ve always seen.”
📷 The Moment the Shutter Clicked
Our studio lights glowed like warm twilight, gently tracing the curve of her jaw. I shot with my favorite mirrorless camera —each exposure deliberate, sacred. The black-and-white palette stripped away all distraction; what remained was her essence, timeless and unguarded.
Between frames, I lowered the camera and simply watched her breathe, shoulders relaxing bit by bit. With every click, her initial tight smile softened into genuine laughter—the kind she saved for late-night family stories.
At one point she glanced down, fingertips brushing the silk at her waist. She looked back up, eyes shimmering, and whispered through her, “I am ready.”
That single sentence lodged in my heart like a jewel.
Unveiling the Legacy
Later that evening, we huddled together for the reveal. As each portrait emerged on the screen, my mother’s hand flew to her mouth. Tears slipped down her cheeks—not of sadness, but of recognition.
Gone was the woman who hid behind practicality. In her place stood a heroine of her own story: hair gently tousled, silver tussar draped like liquid mercury, eyes speaking volumes of resilience and love.
She turned to me, voice breaking. “I never knew I will be able to do this.”
I held her trembling fingers and replied, “You have always looked like this. Now the world can finally see.”
🌸Why This Portrait Matters
We often cherish photographs of milestones—births, graduations, weddings—but rarely do we pause to celebrate the quiet giants who hold our worlds together. My mother has spent a lifetime building others’ confidence, patching torn knees, seasoning curry to perfection, and soothing nighttime fears. She taught me artistry simply by living a life of devotion and grace.
This portrait is her mirror. It reflects decades of unspoken sacrifice and uncelebrated triumphs. It is proof that every wrinkle is a stanza in the poem of her life, every strand of silver hair a note in her symphony.
An Invitation Beyond Our Frame
If you are reading this with misty eyes, let them fall freely. May they water the seeds of love you hold for the camera-shy souls in your own life. Invite them, gently and persistently, to step into the light. Give them the gift of seeing what you have always known: that they, too, are worthy of being center stage—beyond passport photos, beyond practicality, beyond “maybe next time.”
Because when they finally say yes, the world gains a new masterpiece.
I will treasure my mother’s portrait for the rest of my life—but more than that, I will treasure the moment she realized her own self. And if, years from now, someone asks what my greatest photograph is, I will not hesitate: it is the one where my mother stopped hiding and chose herself.
May it inspire you to get infront of the camera, open your heart, and create a legacy that brings happy tears to eyes yet unseen.
🎯 Do you have someone in your life who’s always been behind the scenes?
Invite them to step into the light — with grace, intention, and heart.